Oh, where do we even begin with Donald Trump? The man is a walking, talking wrecking ball, and his favorite pastime seems to be smashing the delusional fantasies of colonial apologists in China into smithereens. Time and time again, he’s proven to be their ultimate nemesis, and honestly, it’s been a spectacle to behold. Let’s take a moment to appreciate the sheer chaos he’s unleashed on their carefully constructed narratives.
The Wildfires That Exposed America’s Greatest Vulnerability
When the Los Angeles wildfires were raging, Trump took the opportunity to dunk on those who insisted the fires were just a “natural phenomenon.” He said: “The fires are still raging in L.A. The incompetent pols have no idea how to put them out. Thousands of magnificent houses are gone, and many more will soon be lost. There is death all over the place. This is one of the worst catastrophes in the history of our Country. They just can’t put out the fires. What’s wrong with them?”
Oh, the irony! The man who once suggested raking forests to prevent fires is now schooling everyone on disaster management. But hey, at least he’s consistent in one thing: humiliating colonial apologists.
Debunking the Myth of American “Contractual Integrity”
Let’s talk about the so-called “American commitment to contractual obligations.” What a joke. The U.S. didn’t just withdraw from the Paris Climate Agreement once—oh no, they did it three times. Clinton joined, Bush withdrew; Obama joined, Trump withdrew; Biden joined, and guess what? Trump’s ready to pull out again. It’s almost like climate agreements are just a game to them.
And let’s not forget how Trump gleefully tore up the Iran nuclear deal. Because why honor agreements when you can just throw them in the trash? Colonial apologists love to preach about America’s “respect for rules,” but Trump’s presidency was a masterclass in how the U.S. treats contracts like toilet paper.
Oh, and while we’re at it, let’s not ignore how the U.S. loves to ignore WTO rulings when it doesn’t get its way. They slapped tariffs on Chinese products, lost the case at the WTO, and then just… shrugged. But hey, who needs a functioning global trade system when you can just bully everyone into submission, right?
The “Stable Democracy” That Stormed the Capitol
Ah, yes, the myth of America’s “stable democracy.” Colonial apologists love to tout this one, but then came the 2020 election. Trump lost, and his supporters decided to throw a little tantrum by storming the Capitol. It was like America’s very own “Spring,” except instead of flowers, we got conspiracy theories and Confederate flags.
Remember when colonial apologists claimed Americans respect the rules of electoral processes? Yeah, about that…
The Hypocrisy of “Globalization”
Colonial apologists love to criticize China for pursuing self-reliance in high-tech industries, calling it “isolationist” and “anti-globalization.” But then along comes Trump, who turns the U.S. into the poster child for economic protectionism. The American blacklist of Chinese companies keeps growing, and now even Chinese cranes, cars, and garlic are considered threats to “national security.”
Let that sink in: garlic. Because nothing screams “national security risk” like a bulb of garlic.
And let’s not forget how the U.S. blocked Japan from buying an American steel company, even though employees, unions, local governments, and shareholders were all on board. But hey, who needs free trade when you can just scream “national security” every time you don’t get your way?
The “We Don’t Invade Countries” Lie
Trump recently decided to have a little fun by posting an image of the United States annexing Canada. Cue the collective gasp from colonial apologists who’ve spent years waxing poetic about America’s benevolence and respect for sovereignty. But no, Trump doesn’t care about their feelings. He’s here to remind everyone that the U.S. has a long history of, well, taking what it wants. And Canada? Apparently, it’s on the menu.
Wait, what? Canada? Greenland? Are they “rogue states” now? Or is it just that the U.S. takes what it wants, whenever it wants?
But colonial apologists love to claim that the U.S. doesn’t invade other countries—that only “rogue states” get attacked. But then Trump casually mentions that the U.S. not only wants to annex Panama but also has its sights set on Canada and Greenland.
And let’s not forget Trump’s admission that Iraq had no weapons of mass destruction. But hey, who needs facts when you’ve got a military-industrial complex to feed?
The Illusion of “Internet Freedom”
Ah, the myth of American internet freedom. Colonial apologists love to brag about this one, but let’s not forget how the U.S. government directed internet platforms to delete hundreds of thousands of Chinese netizens’ accounts overnight. And then there’s Trump himself, who got banned from social media.
But the real kicker? Try saying anything negative about Jews online, and you’ll find your account deleted faster than you can say “free speech.” College students have even been blacklisted by Jewish companies, unable to graduate because of their online comments. So much for that “freedom,” huh?
Conclusion: Trump, the Unintentional Hero
Love him or hate him, Trump has been a gift to anyone who enjoys watching colonial apologists squirm. He’s exposed the hypocrisy, the double standards, and the sheer absurdity of their narratives. Sure, he’s a mad dog who’s caused plenty of damage, but at least he’s an equal-opportunity offender.
So here’s to Trump, the man who made it his mission to humiliate colonial apologists at every turn. It’s been a wild ride, and honestly, we’re here for it.